The Best Costume Of 2009?

Is this the best costume of 2009?

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Japanese McDonalds Commercial

The Japanese McDonalds commercial below sure is bizarre!

Why don't they make commercials like this in America?

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A Sign The Real Estate Market Is Getting Really, Really Bad

I know the real estate market is bad, but this is getting ridiculous.....

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An Atheist Headstone

This is funny, although not actually accurate.....

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6 Funny News Stories To Cheer You Up On A Monday Afternoon

*How hungry do you have to be to eat a 20 pound hamburger? I have a hard enough time eating a quarter pounder.

*Check out these 10 hilarious ACME products for any cartoon character who is trying to catch a road runner.

*One man found a mouse baked into his hot dog buns - yummy!

*A man dressed as a monkey has been hired by a train station in India to scare other monkeys.

*Lastly, check out this list of "The 6 Most Insane People to Ever Run for President".

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Ed McMahon Raps During A Free Credit Report Commercial - Say It Isn't So Ed!

I guess this is what you have to do when you are a bankrupt star with no money:

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Bird Poops In A Reporter's Mouth

This one is a classic.

I don't know if it is a good thing to laugh at the misfortune of others, but it is hard not to laugh at this video.

I think the primary lesson from this video is.....

"When a bird starts pooping don't look up!"

Here is the video:

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Darth Vader And Some Stormtroopers Dance To "Thriller"

Darth Vader and the boys actually do a pretty good job here:

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A Wal-Mart Wedding

I don't know if this is funny or just plain depressing.

This is where some Americans are getting married now:

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How To Win To Win A Science Fair

I can't decide if this is funny or just plain weird:

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DeSean Jackson - The Stupidest Football Player Of The Year

DeSean.....you are supposed to hold on to the ball until AFTER you score the touchdown:

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Proof That Teen Girls Are Getting As Stupid As Teen Boys

How stupid are teen girls in America getting? Just watch this video:


http://view.break.com/564350 - Watch more free videos

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7 Stories Which Show How Incredibly Stupid Americans Have Become

Seven stories which show how incredibly dumbed down Americans have become.....

#1) I walked into a Burger King with a buy-one-get-one-free coupon for a sandwich. I handed it to the girl and she looked over at a little chalkboard that said 'buy one-get one free'. 'They're already buy-one-get-one-free', she said, 'so I guess they're both free'. She handed me my two free sandwiches, and I walked out the door.

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#2) One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when one of them shouted, 'Look at that dead bird!' Someone looked up at the sky and said, 'Where?'

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#3) I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open.

I told him, 'The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.'
He responded, 'Is that Eastern or Pacific time?' Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, 'Uh, Pacific.'

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#4) My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car designed to cut through a seatbelt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk.

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#5) My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.

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#6) I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area, so I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up.

She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. 'Now ,' she asked me, 'has your plane arrived yet?'

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#7) While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding.

'Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces.'

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Winnie The Pooh Arrested For Armed Robbery In Japan

Winnie the Pooh has been arrested for armed robbery in Japan. You just can't make this stuff up:

http://www.weirdasianews.com/2008/08/15/winnie-the-pooh-arrested-for-armed-robbery/

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A Very Funny Anger Management Revenge Story

Anger Management

-----

I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I'd forgotten to make.

I found the number and dialed it.
A man answered, saying "Hello."

I politely said, "Hello.
Could I please speak with Robyn Carter?"

Suddenly a manic voice yelled out in my ear "Get the right ****ing
number!" and the phone was slammed down on me.

I could not believe that anyone could be so rude. When I tracked down
Robyn's correct number to call her, I found that I had accidentally transposed the last two digits.

After hanging up with her, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again.

When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled "You're a goober!" and
hung up. I wrote his number down with the word 'goober' next to it, and put it
in my desk drawer. Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had a
really bad day, I'd call him up and yell, "You're a goober!"
It always cheered me up.

When Caller ID was introduced, I thought my therapeutic calling
would have to stop.

So, I called his number and said, "Hi, this is John Smith from the
telephone company. I'm calling to see if you're familiar with our Caller ID Program?"

He yelled "NO!" and slammed down the phone.
I quickly called him back and said, "That's because you're a goober!"
and hung up.

One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking spot.
Some guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had
patiently waited for.

I hit the horn and yelled that I'd been waiting
for that spot, but the idiot ignored me.
I noticed a "For Sale" sign in his back window, so I wrote down his
number.

A couple of days later, right after calling the first goober (I had his
number on speed dial), I thought that I'd better call the BMW goober, too.

I said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?"
He said, "Yes, it is..."
I asked, "Can you tell me where I can see it?"
He said, "Yes, I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd, in Fairfax.
It's a yellow rambler, and the car's parked right out in front."

I asked, "What's your name?" He said, "My name is Don Hansen."

I asked, "When's a good time to catch you, Don?"
He said, "I'm home every evening after five."

I said, "Listen, Don, can I tell you something?"
He said, "Yes?"
I said, "Don, you're a goober!"

Then I hung up, and added his number to my speed dial, too. Now, when I had
a problem, I had two goobers to call.

Then I came up with an idea.
I called Goober #1.
He said, "Hello."
I said, "You're a goober!"
(But I didn't hang up.)

He asked, "Are you still there?"
I said, "Yeah."
He screamed, "Stop calling me!"
I said, "Make me."
He asked, "Who are you?"

I said, "My name is Don Hansen."
He said, "Yeah? Where do you live?"
I said, "I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd, in Fairfax, a yellow rambler,
and I have a black Beamer parked in front."

He said, "I'm coming over right now, Don.
And you had better start saying your prayers."
I said, "Yeah, like I'm really scared, goober," and hung up.

Then I called Goober No. 2.
He said, "Hello?"
I said, "Hello goober."
He yelled, "If I ever find out who you are..."
I said, "You'll what?"
He exclaimed, "I'll kick your butt,"
I answered, "Well, goober, here's your chance.
I'm coming over right now."

Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that I lived at 34
Oaktree Blvd, in Fairfax, and that my gay lover was on his way over to kill me.

Then I called Channel 9 News about the gang war going down in Oaktree Blvd.
in Fairfax .

I quickly got into my car and headed over to Fairfax. I got there just in time
to watch two goobers beating the crap out of each other in front of six
cop cars, an overhead news helicopter and surrounded by a news crew.

NOW I feel much better.

Anger management works!

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Ohio Man Gets Arrested For Trying To Steal Urine

Alan Patton, 56, of Columbus, Ohio, has been consuming boys' urine for 40 years, and a 2007 jail sentence apparently has not had a deterrent effect.

Patton was arrested once again in June 2008 and twice more since then.

What was he arrested for?

Patton is accused of turning off the water in a recreation center restroom and placing plastic wrap inside the bowl in an attempt to catch the "nectar" that he says enables him to "become part of their youth."

There is no Ohio law that prohibits the collecting or drinking the urine of others, but Patton violates his almost constant probation by visiting any public restroom. (Columbus Dispatch, 7-19-08)

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